i dunch know if i should happy or sad, cause i realise a harsh fact, but i'm trying to take it easy, maybe after all i was wrong from the start, its all begins with me. maybe i should heed the advices from others. oh well, leo is trying to be stronger and happier nowadays, so smile =)

leo is trying to feel a bit happier, maybe hes slowly trying to let things go, maybe hes slowly coming to his sense. Whatever will be, will be. Tony got his license liao..... damn, he started ard 2 mths later den me, and he got his license at his 1st attempt...... damnnnnnnnn i wanna go chiong my practicals too!!!!!!!! haha.... but glad he got his licenese la, although i feel a bit bu shuang, well its alright, i've get it 1 day too, den my car license, den all the license........=)

been blogging a lot recently, maybe because, i've so much i wanted to say, i cant tell my monkey friends my troubles, they'll prolly laugh at me being stupid, i cant tell the other friends tt much of my troubles too, cause i realise i might in the end irritates them only. Or maybe i'm just too afraid to hear somethings that i know they might say, and i am unwilling to hear.....

Today i passed my bike practical subject 7< my most feared subject>, i realise in a lot of things.... the harder i try to get a better result, in the end it just turn out worse..... this is particular true in many aspect for my life.... including my love life.
i realise if i just do things normally, and do within my own best.... things turns out to be so much better, last week, i followed the instructor's direction very closely and tried to make things perfect..... in the end.... i almost crash into another car and i failed the 1st time, today i did it with a very relaxed mood, everything was done smoothly and i passed it......

if i treat her like a normal friend and dont be so hard on myself.... maybe i'll feel better and less hurt... maybe she wont treat me like this now..... maybe you can say i'm oversensetive, but its been quite a while..... i realised.... she treats me better when we first knew each other........ we used to talk about a lot of things, but we hardly can maintain a conversation nowadays, she used to reply my sms, but among the sms i sent... how many did i get back a reply.....
maybe she needs time to bring her to treat me like when she 1st knew me........
i'm so regretted for the things i've done, the things i've say, the childishness of mine..........
i only wish that i could turn back time
back to the time when i first knew her at that dinner
back to the time when i first asked for her number
i only wish that she could forget everything about me, forget that i had ever existed, it'll hurts, but at least i'll start all over again
but its all just a wish, so distant and unreachable........

Wake up rather early, dispite i slept rather late last nite, my hips has recovered 77 88 , yea, i think it'll be ok tomolo =).... some how i feel rather blue this morning, sunday blues? or maybe its because i'm always so blue nowadays, i dunnoe.... just feeling blue.... like my bedroom, where my bed, curtains, carboard dusbin, wall.... everything is blue.....

been thinking, i've think too much but i cant stop thinking, not really in a negative way, but not really in a positive, just think of some people a lot and some things a lot, maybe thats why i'm blue this morning. hope my bike pract later on will be better.....
wished i can throw away this blue feeling..... =\

this afternoon was really a damn funny 1..... first got on to the train and saw this 2 lunatics, 1 was swearing away keep saying who wanna taste his fist , he is welcome to, den the other 1 was down there mumbling away.... haha..... then got 1 lady, poor thing, sat beside tt swearing lunatic.... den he scold her for no reason, saying her no manners..... then the lady walk away.... just luck madam! but kinda funny, still got some girl go argue with tt lunatic...... then the lunatic scold the girl also.... lol............

reach school, did project with my classmates

To my classmates: Sorry for thinking you guys suck in the past, so sorry that i've pass judgement that you guys suck earlier on. You guys were the one that really made me have a good laughter, seriously i never felt happier, although the jokes we shared are lame and stupid, but i enjoyed it.... haha =D, hope we'll be classmates even for future classes!!!!!!!

skipped ief tutorial today, was feeling quite tired and my hips still hurt.... but still must go school to do my freaking project.. damn.... why are there so many projects, bull shit.

Maybe i should try to be a little bit happier, cause i realise i've got a lot of friends that care. Shes not exactly ignoring me anymore, even if i'm back to square one..... at least shes not ignoring anymore. So i should try to appreciate life a little bit more. Just came across a website celest forward me, about love, very true and very real.

In your life, you will meet 4 people
1- yourself
2- Someone you love
3- Someone that love you
4- Someone you can spend your life with

sadly.... the last 3 people usually aint the same person.

The one you love, usually dont loves you
The one that love you, usually aint the one you love
The one that you spend your life with usually is just someone happened to be at the right place at the right time.

Love does not mean possess, if you really love someone, letting go when she dont loves you is the right thing to do, do not obstruct the freedom of hers in search of someone she really love.


Looking at the webby, i felt angry at life...... why must god instill this emotion called as love to us human being, and let there be so much sufferings, hurtings and pains. Yea theres happy endings, but how many happy endings are there compared with those that got so hurt in love? i donch know if my faith in love will be as strong as before, i used to feel that love is a wonderful thing dispite it being so hurting.... but i can feel i'm slowly losing faith in love... let it be, let it be....

when one is unlucky, all the shits comes to him. lost my shoe last week... said the wrong words yesterday, had a bad fall today...my hip hurts.. hurts so much that i really felt like crying.... i used to think that i'm an optimistic guy... but no.... i realise i'm just an ordinary person, thats full of worries and doubts.....

it rained whole day today... as if as the sky is feeling how i feel... crying tears for me..... i really felt like drenching myself in the rain, to wash away all my sorrow. i wish that we can talk again.... but i dunch know when that will be..... if time can turn back.... i wont say those things... at least..... we still talk..... i dun want to make us both uneasy...... i dun dare to face her.... till shes talking with me again....things thats meant to be will be...... i guess this is destined in my life.

although i know that i'm unhappy now.... but i always tell others..... tt we are much more fortunate compared to those dying of hunger in India.... if shit happens to us.... what are they considered.... we should be happy....... but somehow...... i cant
i do smile when my teammates and buddies trys to fool around..... but the smile were short..... i dun smile as often as i do.... i lost my cheery self..... i feel that my heart is dead now..... i feel so dead.... my feelings are going numb too....... maybe because of what instilled in my life.... isnt exactly tt happy for me..... but i'm glad for all the friends and my parents tts there for me for all the time..... i'll cherish my life........but...........

i am just someone thats lost between the boundary of happiness and laughter now....

Richard Marx- Right here waiting

Oceans apart, dae after dae and i slow go insane
i hear your voice, on the line, but it doesnt stops the pain
if i see you next to never, how can we see forever.......
wherever u go, watever u do
i will be rite here waitiing for u
whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks
i will be rite here waiting for u

i took for granted all the time, that i thought would last somehow
i hear the laughter i taste the tears, but i cant get near u now
oh cant u see it baby, u've got me going crazy
wherever u go, watever u do
i will be right here waiting for u
whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks
i will be right here waiting for u
i wonder how we can survive ... this romance


but in the end if i'm with you...... i'll take the chance


oh can you see it baby, you've got me goin crazy,
wherever u go, whatever u do
i will be right here waiting for u
whatever it takes, or how my heart breaks
i will be right here waiting for you.......
waiting for you. .......

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm leo is nv gonna give up in whatever he do, leo will try to be strong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Another Level - From The Heart

I know you've heard these words
A hundred other times before
And you've been hurt and so
Your heart has chose to close the door
Love broke your heart
And brought you lies

Look in my eyes
You'll see a love that's deep and true
Tender and strong
And all for you
You can trust this love
Honest that's the honest truth

From my heart
I'm giving you everything(everything)
From my heart
I promise you that I'll be there(I'll be there to love you)
From the soul
I'm showing you all I feel(all I feel is..)
From my heart
From my heart

I will protect you
And respect you
And be all you need
And when you reach for love
You only need to reach for me
These arms will never let you down

They're staying around
I'll help you through every storm
I'll keep you safe
I'll keep you warm
And you'll have no doubt
You're the one I'm living for

From my heart
I'm giving you everything(everything)
From my heart
I promise you that I'll be there(I'll be there to love you)
From the soul
I'm showing you all I feel(all I feel is..)
From my heart
From my heart

I'll provide the love you need
Just trust my touch
Believe in me
I'll never make you cry
Giving all I got with..all I've got is...

From my heart
I'm giving you everything(everything)
From my heart
I promise you that I'll be there(I'll be there to love you)
From the soul
I'm showing you all I feel(all I feel is..)
From my heart
From my heart

You're not Prince Charming but girls would love to
be your girlfriend after you become friends
with them first.


Are you boyfriend material? ( boys only)
brought to you by Quizilla

Awwww, your just like a puppy in the window of the
animal stores! everyone wants one of u, only
one can have you, and that one who does get you
is a lucky person.


Are you a good boyfriend? (guyz only... this is the good one)
brought to you by Quizilla

leo is unsure of what hes feeling but dunnoe what to say, but wishes to update his blog.... so just type a bit of rubbish..... yea i'm pretty tired still alive and kicking, oh ya i grew a moustach.... hah... i wanna look man!

I Love You So Much
(Park Yong-ha)

Darkness fills the skies, reminds me of your eyes
Beautiful and pure, you were my future
I'm fighting back my tears, wishing you're here
I've fallen without my love i know
Every star i see at night reflects our love
It's infinite but we took time and counted every one

I'm still in love with you, this pain is cutting through
I feel it in my heart, it hurts so deep to be apart
I'm still in love with you,girl, if you only knew
I'll do anything to make you appear in my dreams
I love you so much

Destiny, she cried when we said our last goodbye
How could i be so weak letting go so easily?
My strength is nearly gone, how will i keep going on?
Without you, i'm a ship without my sail
You're the wind, the moon, the sunlight and the rain
You are everything a man could want
I want you back again

I'm still in love with you, this pain is cutting through
I feel it in my heart, it hurts so deep to be apart
I'm still in love with you,girl, if you only knew
I'll do anything to make you appear in my dreams

Lying here imagine me kissing you all over
Then you disappear i reach out for one last touch
Cause i need you so much

I'm still in love with you, this pain is cutting through
I feel it in my heart, it hurts so deep to be apart
I'm still in love with you,girl, if you only knew
I'll do anything to make you appear in my dreams
I love you so much

leo is damn blur la............ i actually left my shoe on the stupid bus..... damn, need to buy new shoe new shoebag , waste marney......... sian i really dun wish this to happen............. damn!

leo is feeling negative now.... ya i know i've been keep telling people to think positively..... but leo just cant help to think negatively...... theres a fear, theres some worries thats slipping into my mind.... but i dun wish to feel this way.. i just hope i can spend my life happily. Leo really wish to hv a happy ending in his love life.... but somehow hes got a negative hunch.....but what else can he do..... nothing! so i know i'm gonna try very hard to make myself think positively and live my life happier

db had a mooncake festival celebration~ hah quite fun, ate so much moon cakes..... bleah sick -_-. i am so regretful........................i regret i bought pro complex vanilla flavour..... cause it really suck so much i had to eat a sweet after drinking it .. argg

The furthest distance is when your so near but your heart is so far away....... i've came across this sentence upteen times... and i thought it wasnt true. but somehow i am slowly understanding how the feeling is like..... the distant feeling that arise when you look at the one your fond of...... it isnt a gd feeling..... its a sad and lonely feeling..... but how could this feeling stop? i only wish that i could reach her heart one day....

Yesterday leo been zouk.... heh.... ok la quite fun but could be better cause we only got 4 people, if more people should be great yea? heh.... dance till leg gonna break~ haha.. dint got to drink the drink i wanna drink too.. drank some stupid pineapple juice my friend ordered =.=

Life is full of ups and downs... do not because of something bad that happened once and affect your life. Let it be an experience, something that can make you stronger! I know that when your down and low, you'll feel like that theres no one that cares about you. but thats not the case, your parents do, your friends do, even if they scold you, they just aint expressing their concern in the correct way. Even if you think that everyone in the world is turning against you, i'll stay by urside =)

today is quite tiring... had training.... 6 sets of 1000 and some starts..... then in small boat somemore.. row until my fingers got blister and so tired... haha but its my passion =D. Dunnoe why.....after litsening to chu ci zhi wai..... i keep thinking.......y i didnt get to know her earlier.... y.....budden again..... if i really did know her earlier.......would it really make any difference...... at least the leo she know now... is the one that had grown up.... not the 1... bounded by jealousy and childishness and unreasonablity....

today leo had a boring day just go bike pract, stone at home, dine at clementi, stone at home again.... stonage -___- .... download a couple o song.... liked van fan yi cheng's chu ci zhi wai a lot..... and i think it best describe how i feel now... i wanna dedicate this song to her....

Chu ci zhi way- Van fan yi cheng
Say good night, wa an (good night)
xie xie ni pei wo yi zheng ge ye wan (thanks for accompanying me thru the nite)
close your eyes, be quiet
wo ming bai ni you zhi ji de bu an(i understand that theres uncertainties in you)
hen duo lai bu ji, wo bu cheng kan jian ( theres a lot of things that i've not seen)
wo ji yu jian ni de xian zai(i've only met you now)
bu guan ni jie shou huo li kai (no matter you accept or u gonna leave me)
i hope to stay for a while
chu ci zhi wai (other then this)
yao ni ming bai (i want you to understand)
ni de xiao wo zhen shi xi huan kan ( i really love to see you smile)
yu shi wo yi ci you yi ci deng dai ( thats why i'm waiting for you again and again)
qi shi dou hai suan yu kuai ( but actually its quite a blessing)
chu ci zhi wai ( other then this)
fei chang yi han ( its such a pity)
ni de xin wo hai shi da bu kai ( i cant open up your heart)
and if u need somebody
wo que ding wo hui zai ( i am sure that i'm around)
bu hui zhou kai (wont ever leave you)

So good bye, wan an (good nite)
she bu de kan ni jue de bu zhi zai ( cant bear to see you feel uneasy)
its alright, i'm fine
kan qi lai, zhe gu shi hui xie bu wan (it seems that the story never ends)
hen duo cha yi dian ni mei you fa xian ( theres many things that you never discover about me)
ni ji shi ren shi wo de xian zai ( you only know me from now)
bu guan ni liu xia huo zhou kai ( no matter if you'll stay or leave)
I'm gonna stay for a while
chu ci zhi wai (other then this)
yao ni ming bai (i want you to understand)
ni de xiao wo zhen shi xi huan kan ( i really love to see you smile)
yu shi wo yi ci you yi ci deng dai ( thats why i'm waiting for you again and again)
qi shi dou hai suan yu kuai ( but actually its quite a blessing)
chu ci zhi wai ( other then this)
fei chang yi han ( its such a pity)
ni de xin wo hai shi da bu kai ( i cant open up your heart)
and if u need somebody
wo que ding wo hui zai ( i am sure that i'm around)
chu ci zhi wai (other then this)
wo hai zai deng dai ( i'm still waiting)
ni de xin (for your heart)
jiang wei wo chang kai ( will open up for me)
but if you need somebody
ni zhi dao wo hui zai ( you know that i'll be here)
bu hui zhou kai, bu hui zhou kai........... ( never ever leave..... never ever leave...)

You come from the Night Sky. You're drawn to the
stars and planets, and it's no wonder why, you
came from them.


Where Did Your Soul Originate?
brought to you by

This quizzla thing is so cool.. ya..... quite true also... ha.... i really wish i am a protector.... to protect my love ones... my family... my friends... you.... I wish that 1 day i'll be the one protecting your smile from fading away.... wiping away your tears.

Protector


The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla

You are Love.

You love life, you love all those around you and
the world that you live in. You are happiest
when you are doing something for someone else
or for the common good of mankind.


What Emotion Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

"I.... even if you lose all your memories, even if we become seperated....if we meet again....we'll just do it all over again...no matter how many times, no matther how many years it takes." leo... watched a very touching anime movie today..... a very beautiful story. About the love of a goddess and a mortal.... makes me really very touched. I wish i could love and be loved in the way in the movie..... no matter what.. i will always be by your side protecting your smile. Even if the enemies are god... i'll protect you. Leo feels so much love all of a sudden....

Anywhere for you - backstreetboys

I'd go anywhere for you
Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you
Anything you want me to

I'd walk halfway around the world
For just one kiss from you
Far beyond the call of love
The sun, the stars, the moon
As long as your love's there to lead me
I won't lose my way, believe me
Even trough the darkest night you know

I'd go anywhere for you
Anywhere you asked me to
I'd do anything for you
Anything you want me to
Your love as far as I can see
Is all I'm ever gonna need
There's one thing for sure
I know it's true(I know it's true)
Baby, I'd go anywhere for you

I used to think that dreams were just
For sentimental fools
And I'd never find someone
Who'd give their love so true
But I knew the very minute
Couldn't live my life without you in it
And now I want the whole wide world
To know

I'd go anywhere for you (Anywhere)
Anywhere you asked me to (I'd do anything)
I'd do anything for you (Whatever you want me to)
Anything you want me to (Oh, yeah, oh baby, yeah)
Your love as far as I can see
Is all I'm ever gonna need

There's one thing for sure I know is true
Baby, I'd go anywhere for you
For you